Here’s why you should talk about suicide

Suicide is the loss of a life at the hands of the very person living it.  It is raw, and it is scary.

Suicide is a sensitive subject – one that not everyone is comfortable with. People often shy away from talking about suicide because it’s not something they want to accept as relevant – they’d rather ignore it and hope it goes away.

Unfortunately this creates a vicious cycle, as it instills a fear in the suicidal – they are afraid that they will be judged and ridiculed for acknowledging their demons, and so they choose to suffer silently.  If people don’t openly talk about suicide, those suffering from its hold will not feel comfortable in coming forward to ask for help. They will be much more likely to succumb to their dark thoughts if they aren’t confident someone can help in fighting them off.

The depressive suicidal don’t believe in getting better – they don’t believe it’s possible.  They feel like they are stuck.  Hope is a foreign concept.  They don’t know what hope means anymore because they’ve forgotten what they’re being hopeful for.  They’ve forgotten what it feels like to be happy, and so they feel like happiness just doesn’t exist for them.  They aren’t hopeful they’ll get better because they can’t imagine a different life for themselves; they don’t remember life before depression took over.

Although society is headed in the right direction, there is still a strong stigma attached to mental health disorders and suicide.  We can’t fight that stigma with silence, and so we need to get people talking.

We need to open up.  We need to share our stories.  Because by sharing our stories, we can open eyes.

We can save lives.

Many of those we speak to will have never experienced this sort of thing for themselves.  Some might have a friend, a sibling, a parent or a child, who has.  We might be speaking to some people who have never ever knowingly been touched by suicide.

However, I can guarantee that we will also be speaking to people who have.  We might even unknowingly speak to someone who already has a plan.

We can be the reminder to that person that there is another way, even if they can’t see it right now.

We can be the reminder that they’re not alone, even if it feels like they are.

We can be the reminder that it’s okay to talk about it – and that they should talk about it.

We can be the reminder that they can get help; that things can change – that things can get better.

We can be the reminder that suicide doesn’t always win.

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8 thoughts on “Here’s why you should talk about suicide

  1. Let’s do get talking about this…

    I’ll do the best I can…I’m not very articulate…

    Hope IS a foreign concept when we are at that level, the entire world has turned to nothing but dark – every single memory of our lives is dark – any new experience is nothing but darkness and the void…and feels pointless and hurts because it is MORE darkness. And this feeling isn’t for a few minutes, it goes on for days, weeks, months…..

    The scary thing about it, it feels comfortable. The acceptance of the darkness. Now we know there is nothing, we are nothing, everything is pain…but there is an exit from this pain…the only one, the final one, the thought of which gives comfort…

    I’ve been on the outside as well. Talking to others as they went through this. I was very happy to be there for them, glad they had reached out. To anyone.

    Like

    • Oh, I wish I could edit that…I’m not currently in that state of thought, it’s a memory. Not a good one, but am quite 😀 right now.

      Like

      • you’re totally right- it does become a comfort in a way. we reach a point where we just sort of accept that defeat; we’re happy to stop fighting because we’re sick of losing the battle. we’re sick of being weak.
        accepting that defeat at least lets us feel like we are somewhat in control: like we’ve made at least one decision here.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. “The suicidal don’t believe in getting better”

    I take issue with this statement. I am of the mind that you have, accidentally, bolstered the issue. I think that we, as a society and culture, need to stop seeing a darker and more depressive state of mind as an issue. Instead, we need to accept darker views and opinions. If people feel segregated because of a view or something else they hold very dear, the risk is that they will try to eradicate it. Make everyone else comfortable. Or, at least, that is one state of mind. I know that is the one I fought through for many years. In my position, pity and sadness was the worst way for people to deal with it. It felt like a spotlight was being placed on the issues in my head (or life) and it just made everything worse for me.
    I am well aware that I am one instance, and not everyone is like that. We need to come to a place that we are acknowledging that suicide exists and know that it is something that can happen if a certain personality is pushed over a bink. We need to realize that we do not always know what is wrong or if we can fix it. The most we can do is just always be ready to accept people and be willing to try our fucking hardest to fix what we can.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I get where you’re coming from and I agree with you to a point.

      There are many types of suicidal people. Here, I was referring to the depressive suicidal (I don’t believe that all suicidal people are necessarily depressed).

      I don’t pity these people: I feel for them. There is a difference.
      I feel for them and I understand what it’s like to no longer have any hint of desire to stick around. I don’t know their situation specifically, but I do know what it feels like to be uncomfortable in asking for help out of fear of judgment. Not saying everyone is like this. And not everyone can be helped (or wants to be helped): you’re right. And as much as I hate that truth, I know it and I accept it.

      Im focusing here on those people we CAN potentially help.

      Liked by 1 person

    • I understand what you are saying here.

      You are saying “Acceptance of ‘Other’ ” rather than “condemn (bully/scapegoat) or convert (make like me) ‘Other’ “.

      With depressives as ‘Other’,

      We all know the effects of ‘condemn’.

      ‘Conversion’, though….to be forced or coerced into being something you are not, simply to appease. To lose a part of one-self, or most of it – their very identity…a terrifying idea.

      So, acceptance of each other as we are, not trying to push each other into our ideas of how a person should be. This is a good start, yes?

      Liked by 2 people

      • Oh, that was @jmgard. The replies work differently here..

        I would like to get these discussions out of ‘our area’ and more into mainstream. But this is a good place to start. Maybe if we can figure out how to say these things, we can reach out more.

        Liked by 2 people

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